Hello all I am a 50(ish) woman and just got Ellie a 21yr old mare. She is a quiet girl and sweet as she can be. It has been many many years since I have ridden and/or been around these wonderful horses. She is being moved in a week or so to her new home and I need to do some ground work with her. I have ridden her and she is great but I need some pointers on what I should work on to help she and I bond. She has really taken to me in just a few short visits. Thanks so much for all your advise.

Cyndy

Hi, Cyndy! It's great to have you join the forum and exciting to hear that you're getting back into horses again. They're so rewarding and enriching to our lives.

Ellie sounds like a good choice, being an older and well-broke mare. As far as advice, it sounds like you want to have a good transition in moving her to a new place, as well as form a bond with her. Horses are pretty versatile and adapt well to new owners and places, but there are a few things I would suggest.

If she is going to be pastured with other horses, I would first of all make sure she will get along with them well before turning them loose in a large area like a pasture. When she gets to the new place, keep her in a stall or smaller pen for the first day or two. She should be introduced to other horses over a strong and safe fence at first. Let them sniff, squeal, paw, or nip with a good safe fence between them at first. You don't want to deal with any bruises, abcesses, or cuts from being kicked or run through a fence first thing. So let her get to know them a little over a fence first. They usually establish a pecking order rather quickly, so the showing off and snorting should get over with soon.

I would give Ellie a little while to get used to the new surroundings before riding her much, unless it is done in a very safe place like an arena. As far as groundwork ideas, lungeing her is a great excercise. I suggest lungeing before each ride unless she is just really laid-back and has no problem with you climbing right on and being calm and relaxed on a ride. If she is nervous, hyper, or exhibits too much energy, lungeing for fifteen minutes before each ride will help with that.

Keep her feed the same as she's used to, unless your veterinarian suggests a change. A lot of people tend to "spoil" their new horse, wanting to give it the best of everything, and they overfeed it and it gets ornery on them. Grains such as corn, barley, and oats are very "hot" grains, which can result in even the best trained horse turning into a bucker or runaway. If your mare is in good health and maintains her weight easily, a high-protein grass mix hay might be all she needs. If she needs more than that, find a pelleted feed that is low in carbohydrates to supplement with. Other grains should be limited to a handful here and there as a treat, unless she is really laid back and needs the extra fat and energy.

Also, try to keep her tack and especially the bit the same as she is used to. Changing bits can really confuse a horse, and cause problems that you don't want to deal with. If she goes well in what she's used to, there's no reason to change.

As far as forming a bond with your horse, in my opinion it is something that happens after a lot of time has been invested in the relationship. Some horses seem to bond immediately, and others you might feel that you never do "click" with. But sometimes if a horse is obedient and easy to handle, you can be satisfied with that and not expect too much more. Horses aren't exactly like a dog that just runs to meet you when you arrive...they can still have affection and trust in you and not evidence it so much. I think if you spend a lot of quality time with this mare and she knows she can expect consistently kind treatment from you, she will bond with you and you'll be a great team. But if she is obedient and calm to ride, I think you should congratulate yourself on choosing a great horse and not stress about bonding too much. That's just my opinion.

Anyway, I'm really glad you've joined the forum here and hope to hear from you often! If there are specific things you would like help with, please post again.

I would just add that a good thing to do with your mare when you move her to a new place is to take her on a lead line and walk her around the place to get used to everything. I guess that might not be considered "groundwork", but I think any time you spend with this mare will be a help, and she'll get to see the new location and maybe feel more settled in.

Good luck with her! Let us know how the transition goes.

unfortunately, daisy is right and there probably isn't a quick way to bond with a horse, but it sounds that you're on the right track and just the fact that you're concerned about it will probably help you along the way.

i will share with you a couple things that Kevin Wescott (does the advice column on this site) taught me that may help the process a little bit. First off, Kevin says that most people misunderstand "personal space" regarding your horse. If your horse wants to be close to you, that's a GOOD thing, don't go by those "arm's length" rules or anything like that. It is critical that the horse doesn't push you around or try to take your space, but a horse who enjoys being close to you is a horse more likely to trust and like you.

Secondly, when your horse is standing near you, it's even better if they drop their head, because it shows that not only do they want to be near you, but while they are near you they don't feel like they have to have their head up and be constantly on guard, they are counting on you to watch out and protect them. So reach up the back of their neck about halfway and squeeze both sides of the neck until the horse drops their head, then immediately release. Do this (it make take a few sessions) until the horse will keep their head down when they are with you. As I said this is a big show of trust in you, they know you're watching that scary dog/car/flag/whatever for them and when they are with you, everything is ok.

Good luck to you, I'd encourage you to e-mail Kevin directly if you still have questions, he's one of the very best we know of when it comes to horses, chances are you'll be very impressed with anything he tells you and very happy with the results.